My Baby Daddy! I Have a Choice!

Soul Mates

SBF seeking a SB/WM. Must be Tall. Dark. Handsome. Extremely Intelligent. College-Educated (preferably with a Master's or Doctorate degree), Accomplished. Athletic. Well-Rounded. Well-Traveled. Likes Pets. Filled with Good Humor. Easy Going...

Hmmmm. This would make a great personals ad for a prospective husband/soulmate.

But, what if I add the following? Excellent Eye Sight. Excellent General Health. No Familial History of Genetic Diseases. No Familial History of Mental Illness. CMV Negative. No History of Acne. Straight Teeth. No Male Pattern Baldness. Exceptional Sperm Count.

Aaaaaah. Doesn't sound very romantic, does it?  Now, it has become something totally different. This set of criteria are not things one usually thinks about when dating and falling in love. Rather, my "personals ad", along with the added criteria, actually morphed into many of the characteristics I would require for the father of my children.

As I considered having a baby on my own, without a boyfriend or a husband, I was forced to consider using donor sperm to make it happen. At the outset, the process of choosing the father/donor for my child seemed  quite overwhelming. So, I started the search for my "baby daddy" with trepidation, fearful I wouldn't find someone who met my expectations.

"Well," you might ask, "How did I come to my decision?" It wasn't easy. I started with choosing the right sperm bank. After hours of research and studying various materials, I settled on three sperm banks: Xytex, CCB and Fairfax. Then the real work began. Using my personals ad and additional characteristics, I searched the databases of each sperm bank. The amount of information available is astounding. You can search for such criteria as race, height, CMV status, blood type, reported pregnancies, open donor or anonymous donor, etc. After doing several searches, I received a number of prospects.

Contrary to popular belief, there is a plethora of information available on a donor, including personal medical histories, extensive family medical histories, personality profiles, childhood and adult photos, audio interviews and written essays. The sperm banks try to provide as much information as possible to help clients make this life-altering decision. The amount of information provided makes one feel as if they actually know the donors.

I surveyed at least 20 profiles with serious interest. Then I narrowed my choices to the top three profiles from each sperm bank. I was down to nine. At this point, I narrowed my choices by choosing the sperm bank I would most like to work with. The one I chose actually has a policy of contacting donors once the child is 18, regardless of whether the donor is open or anonymous. This sperm bank also has a free sibling registry for its clients. This way, my child can make contact with his/her brothers and sisters while growing up.
Finally, I chose my top donor from my favorite sperm bank. My donor had everything I was looking for in the father of my child.

True Soul Mates

My choice made, a huge weight was lifted from my shoulders. There are no words to express the excitement I felt. And then I realized what a wonderful experience this was. I was getting exactly what I wanted for the father of my child.  "Love" didn't cloud my judgement. I could choose my "baby daddy" based upon the factors that were important to me. This person had everything I wanted from a mental, physical and health perspective. My chosen donor, number 12261, would provide me with my true soul mate -- the child that I so desperately desire!!